TQ for asking. it rili meant a lot for me ",

gmbr di sblh adelah sebuah gitar kot2 anda tidak tahu mengenai kewujudannya. HAHA :p

tika saat ini sy begitu kepingin mahu memetik itu gitar. and play sumthin nice..do i own one? nope! do i noe how to play one? lagilah tak! huhuu~

aku mahu belajar maen itu gitar. sapekah yg sudi jd guru aku? sapekah? sapekah? haha. mcm wat iklan job offer lak kat blog sndiri. haha.

knape teingin blaja? mau jd seperti diva Yuna? haha. divakah? huhu. taklah. xde kaitan ngn sesape pon. cume terasa dpt release a bit STRESS if it were to be my hobby one day. huhu.

yup. life had been rough lately. here i stated LIFE okayh. not juz love. life. life. i've been surrounded by an irritated person for yearsss. yes i do hav a limit. but i can burst out too. uhuh. there's a lot goin on my mind already. i wanna go away. as far as i can. why? i dun wanna be ending up turning into an irritating person. so better i leave. if only time flies way faster. malas dah nak layan karenah manusia. nnt last2 kite jek wat dosa. what for? better just fades away. and gone. i know sum ppl would juz love to see me gone from their sight. not far long enuf. i'll wait patiently. uhuh~~

iklan jap.

hey. i bru je bkk dictionary. u were right lar. sori i tersalah kasi info.
patience = kesabaran
patient = sabar. pesakit

listening to my fave instrumental. entry pon sadis. haha.

it's the end of January..
i've wasted a month.
doin almost nothing...
seriously..
those that surrounded me can be
a perfect witness..
takyah ssh2 r..tnye sv aku sudah..
sepjg Jan, aku x pi pon jmpe dia..
smpai dia pon risau..
she tot i was too stressed with developing
my fyp. hmm. if only that were true..
i'm not even close enuf on doin my keris tuh..

tomorrow's already Feb..
i wouldnt want it to be the next month
to be wasted as previous..
i hope i can pull myself together..
i've started yesterday...
at least it's a gud start.
i've start holding my highlighter and study
for my test....i'm glad ",

eventho
things got pretty ugly sumwhere along
the life..i'll be fine. i'll be fine.
i know each and everything that happens
have their own special reasons...

time cant wait for us.
yet i do like to wait for it.
but what for...
it's not like i can get out of this darkness again...
i will go out..i will..
if there is a light that can shine me..
i only hope that when that moments come..
it is still not too late..
after all...i so am not immortal..
i dun hav that much time to still breathe..
to still hear this magnificent sound of my heart beat..
i know..
only i know..
what do i know? huhu. nothing.
juz playing with my words..

sumwhere along the heart here, lies
a rili beautiful waterfall...
it's where i hope..
to meet my sarangheyo...
before it's too late..~

waiting. undelivered. why meyh? huhu~

caption di atas takde kaitan lngsong ngn cite di bwh. huhu.

ohh my.

just watched my most heartthrob actor. Mr CK aka supermanku. hee :p

2 hour of smallville had made my day.

after the series break, which was a rili long waiting moments for me. haha.

tadi dinner plak bertemankan sorang lg yg leh wat penulis blog sgt hepi. haha.

sape? mcm hape je. padehal tgk tv je pon. tadik ade cite Kau & Aku. layan jela. tgk AKIM. hehe ",

bleh plak rineh lupe ari Sabtu.

aku lupe tgk Three Brothers. my latest korean addiction after IRIS.

tinggal dlm 20 mins bru aku tgk. uhuh. yela td maghrib pala otak pon a bit

tak btol. huhu. ape kena ntah. huu~

ps: takkn tgk tv je arineh aku neh kan. huhu. idok lerh. a whole day tadik i spent time with browser, notes and textbooks. for real? haha. i got a test laaaa...hehe. then bile nk wat keje SE. aduh. tros jam otak. tak retiiii. bace note. sah . satu haprak tak phm. waaa~~~ cik diana, cik fara, cik yan. ajar saye. ajar saye :p

...

time: nak dekat maghrib.
condition: bru pas awake.
worries: ntah. sgt sgt rase tak sedap hati. haishh~


ps: dunno why. mayb terlebih tdo. eh tak jgk. but terase gile lah tak sedap hati. uhuh. hope ALL of my sayangs are doin fine at the moment. and will stay that way~ inshaAllah~

merepek agi.

diz morning.
again.
dreamed again.
mimpi ape?
i pon x hengat. HAHA :p
cuma ingt org yg terlibat
scara lngsng/ tidak langsng. huhu~

and again.
every morning.
as i looked at my cell..
the hope juz died.
huu~

haihh~~ penat dah jerit. nangis. siap pkai mende alah kuning tuh agi. huhu. apekah penyakit pekakku sudah berjangkit? haha

another 5 years?

juz got back.
splendid moments
with the classmates =)
great foods.
sweet fwens.
picturesque view.
another memories to cherish.
all in all. FUN. FUN. FUN ",
i'll update later with the photos.
penat-lah skrng. nak tdo jek.
huhu.

ps: i got a stalker on my fb. or is it stalkerS. haha. sunggoh perasan. one word. cool~ woohooo :p

i need crayon-lah! nik cepat kasi :p

awake.
hee. terbgun lmbt laks :p
mimpi lagenda.
tapi the whole morning
i thought of the light. lampu ape? lampu neon?
haha. no-lah..the light that shines me no more~

i guess..
no matter how far i'll go through this
dark forest, the light will never show up
to guide me along the way to the real world..
although...
the heart here can always seems to find the light
sumwhere along the way...

ahh.
confession.
dun think i can ever make the light fades out.
dun think i can ever erase the footmark.
damn.
i hate the so-vulnerable of me. huh. there. period.

dpt choc free. virtual je pon. haha :)

hey..

sok tak jadik bbq kat bkt cerakah..
still dunno where..
sok bru tau final result katne..
siti n khairee came by juz now..
anta those foods nk tumpang kat my fridge..
tenkiu la kat dieorg sume..
prepare n marinate everythin =)

class pg. i ponteng. hee. sakit pewot yg amat sgt. haizz. perut oh perut. knape lately sgt sakit. jgn sakit lagi k. saye tamao ended up like few years back then. huu~~
noon pegi. tuhpon sbb kne present.
ptg. cancel. yippie. haha.

oh yup. td ptg ade briefing psl practical training.
sama jek cam diploma.
bezanya takde presentation.
how i'm relieved. haha. tp still la kne wat report..
so during this 3 weeks i've to find myself few places utk prac nanti..
yg kelakanye. prac 6 weeks jek. haha. ape sgtlah nak wat..
dip dlu syiok gak. 1 sem. huhu. ala takpelah. 6 weeks pejam mata da abes.
haha. still tatau nk carik area mane. coz i'll be moving as soon as abes blaja.
where to? jeng3. haha. not far tho. dekat jek. hee.
so knela carik company yg dkat ngn area i pindah tuh. huhu

then sue came up with the topic master tadik..encik yunus ade sebut td. tuhla ponteng agi. haha. well, again. the mind a bit pening. tatau nk further uni mane. encik yunus galakkan futher
kat upm. tapi tuhla..i mcm berminat lak mau gi usm. huhu. takpelah. saye mahu apply sumelah.
um, ukm, upm, usm, etc. haha. tgk offer letter mane yg lawa smpai kat umah! HAHA :p

td pi buang undi.
seyes tak knal langsong.
men pangkah jek aku. huhu..
tibe2 tringat previous election time. aku dok
sibok promote lagenda kat everyone. haha
and he won. yay!

oklah. already azan maghrib.
mlm neh mlm jumaat.
dun forget to recite surah Yaasin yaa ",

ps: heroes da abes donlod. yay! n esok. smallville kuar. FINALLY! Mr. CK is back. how cool :)

crazy rambling at midnite!

i had a great time today.
lepak-ing the whole day with
my nicest sweet fwens ",

didnt do nythin tho.
but the fact that we juz talked and laughed.
had made my day.
i appreciated it.
thank you :)
[mekaseh sudi jd drebar saye. mekaseh jd tukang gelak sy wat lawak tak jadik. mekaseh. mekaseh]

ohh. lupe.
arineh saye jd budak baek.
tak ponteng even one class. hee :p
tp tatau lak camne.
sbb sok ade class 830. FYP lak tuh. need i say more? huh~
so, depends. i rili hope my mood wont be goin haywire..
i rili hav sumthin to discuss with my lctrr bout my fyp.
but like i said. in the morning i tend to feel ohh~~ i dunno~~
so the probability for me to skip is way soooo high. haha :p

i baru abes layan OTH latest epi. bru abes donlod tadik.
well it was an okay epi. xdela besh sgt pon..
but i rmbbr one of the line..

"Lauren: being lonely sucks...yeah actually. beyond sucks~~~"

yup. true. all i hav every single night with me. is the pc. the wall. the furniture. my bantal bushuk. my other bantals. my comfy bed. the door. the window. yeah. u can say of how lonely this life is. i so missed my college days. at least i dun hav to end up talking to the wall. or staring one hour without blinking at the plaster ceiling. huu~

wanna noe what i'm craving for. SHOWER! haha.
bleh plak. it's midnite okayh~ heee~
well who cares. juz wanna get the mind here off thinkin bout diz one particular thing.
okayh off i go! niteeee~~

this is me. that is me. which one?

ihateme~

the me that cant prioritize her life at the moment.
the me that doesn't think well to decide.
the me that follows the intuition whether in sober or not.
the me that let everyone that she heart plus her own self down.
the me that don't care bout others and always being selfish.
the me that forgets about what she wanna achieve.
the me that is sick of making fake smiles.
the me that is not afraid of what she will lose.
the me that don't work hard anymore and just accept.
the me that always tangle on stuff that don't matter.
the me that always pretend to be tough.
the me that is afraid. so afraid. and afraid.

yet..

i love being me.
bcoz this is me.
i can be this me.
i can be that me.
well
everything depends.
on what is fated to be.






to u-know-who, plz stop reading my blog. i've stop invading ur privacy. so plz let me have mine. i can put this on private. but i am so malas nak invite each of my friends email to do so. i juz dun want u to be reading how my life are upside down. juz go read on other blog except mine. tq.

nice~

baru pasan ade lagu neh dlm iPodku. haha.
nmpk sgt all these while asek dgr playlist yg sama jek.huhu.
gonna hav to rest a while from dat. kalo x, camno nk lupe. haha.
rupenye ade byk lagi lagu yg besh dlm neh. huhuu~
well, neway dgr first beat lagu neh tros suke.
melody cool!~~

saye nak demam. cptlah dtg :p

juz got home.
ade one class jek.
ptot xyah gi kot.
haha.
yelar. blk class ngn ujan lebat gile.
mmg tak penah kot aku sekuyup tuh.
huhu.
bek ponteng jek.
haha.
smlm dah lar wat mc sndiri a.k.a ponteng-lah! hee :p
dah x jd azam aku thun neh..
bru ingt tanak ponteng.
sok pon cam malas nk gi. sbb keje x siap agi.
haha. sukati jek.

kappa? vida? pitta?
anda yg mane satu?
haha. tuhla aku blaja kat kelas phi td..
ape mnde tuh sume.
haa..google la sndiri. haha.






jiwaku sgt kacau pd ketika ini. wherever you are. wait. wrong. i know exactly where you are. i'll always recite something for you every single day. that is the only best gift ever after all~ i missed ur warm hugs. always~~~~~

mamat!

aku bru bgn tido..
pelik.
bgun2 jer..otak aku tune in intro lagu Exist Kuman HIV.
ahaks. lama gila kot x dgr. haha.
dan2 tros donlod. bleh la plak kan tune in. adoi. huhu.

ohh lupe. yup. saye adalah seorg kipas susah mati exist suatu ketika dlu..
zaman mamat lar bkn ezad tuh. my first band performance on stage yg
aku penah gi kump exist lah. haha. so kelaka. ingt lagik..
kat tasek titiwangsa..

paling xleh blah. aku siap x bsuh tgn blk umah
selama bbrp jam. nape? sbb dok pegang tgn sndri bau tgn mamat. HAHA.
sonok sgt. dpt salam ngn mamat after the whole sume org berasak-asak cam org gile.
termasok aku. huhu. seb beklah mamat dgr. mak aku dok jerit. mamat..mamat..neh salam la budak neh..sian dia. huhu. mamat yg tgh bz sain autograf. senyum dan pndang saye. dan salam. chang! dunia terasa indah seketika. haha. i think i was tadika kot. huhu.

ps: lerh. bru tau. mamat da cerai ngn bini dia thun lpas. adeh. artis sokmo gitu. cerai je kje. huu~

i'm done.

Dear Mr. I,

i've said what is needed.
i've done what to be done.
i've given what to give.
yet.
only a word.
unappreciated~

i dun wanna be a fool nymore..
i dun wanna be stupid nymore..
u must've laughed ur heart out loud..
seeing me get easily played..

just forget me.
forget everything i wrote bout u here.
i noe u can easily forget me.
u've forgotten already..

u didnt appreciate me. i hav no reason to still hope.
i dun think there is a life living in hopes.
i wont be saying my gratitude and sorry here..
i've texted those words a lot of times already..

i dun seek for a million of dollars. only a word of appreciation.

Sayonara Sarangheyo~

Love,
Hazrati.

ps: to my readers, sorry for making this public..~

one word.

one word.
4 vowels.
4 consonant.
a devastated meaning.
went right through the heart.

yes.
i am.
oversensitive.
if u hadn't realize it by now.

again.
and again.
and again.
doin stupido thingy.
running out of kleenex already.
uhh~

d r e a m~

apparently i was just dreaming..
even when i was so awake in reality..
i guess..most dreams are too good to be true..
i wont be dreaming nymore..
that day i got my smile..
well..
it was just another fairy tale..
indeed true..
coz only in fairy tales..
my heart smiled..
i'll stop dreaming for now..
coz..
i dun wanna be dropping any tears..
when i finally realize the actual truth~

ape terkilan in english ek? anyone~

juz writing diz down to ease the pain..
felt a bit terkilan..
even for only 0.01%..
still terasa kot..

i hope i can hold tighly onto
my instincts..
coz right till now..
i do still believe..
believing in the light will soon shines me..~

but there are moments...
i can fall..i can get down..the feelings inside is so vulnerable~
and i need a shoulder to hang onto..
i couldnt possibly wait for
it to only comes in dream..
huhhh~~

eventho others offering their shoulders..
still it's urs..
the heart recognizes.
u. my most favorite person ",

last week was a blast!

hello all,

last week on Friday, i had loads of fun
with my multimedia besties ",
they're such and such nice frenz and a great
accompany during my dull days. THANKS ^_^

so the story was kiteorg pegi Taman Pertanian Malaysia Bukit Cahaya Seri Alam.
aduh, pjg naa...or in short. it used to be called Bukit Cerakah..
kat area2 seksyen 8.

mule2 excited r...last2 penat nk mampos kot.
haha. smpai2 kne gi rent a bike. pastu pe lagi mulalah the cycling up and down the hill.
down is heaven okayh. goin up the hill. ohh. exhausted gile kot. haha. tercungap-cungap sume. ade gak r benti few mins juz to catch a breath. hehe. and lupe lak. thanks kat nik and sue sbb bwk kopok n drinks! huhu

so bile da smpai umah 4 musim tuh...sonok jugaklah. mmg freeze to death n mmg real gile snow dia..tapi x syiok sgt...sbb kawasan dia sgt sgt terhad...hmm...i tot like leh maen2 or wat snowmen. eventually, tak. so agak frust disituh. huu~
tapi sape2 yg nk experience suasana winter. do come. yes do come. great oppur lar :)

mase blk..singgah zoo haiwan. aku tgk kuda ngn burung kakak tua. haha. mmg sonok lyn burung tuh. huhu. nk tgk haiwan kesukaanku, arnab...tapi da takde plak. dlu ader..
tp sepjg trip yg besh neh. aku dok asek teringt jek manusia kesukaanku. haa..sape? jeng3. huhuu :p

then otw blk kat entrance....bleh la plak..aku hampir kne pelok ngn berok2 yg sgt tak ensem kat situh. chett. huhu. luckily i ran away..last2 dia attack Alya, Ayu and Sue. heee..sian korang. kiteorg yg len cabut je awal2. haha :p

dahla. penatla type. tak ingt sgt dah. sbb da lama. huhu. btw, diz coming friday will be goin there again. tapi ngn satu batch. wat BBQ. huhu. cant wait!
oklah, do enjoy the pics. bukan sng i nk upload pic. sgt malas. neh pon mood rajin tibe2 dtg. haha.

nehla tmpt yg dituju ",

ohh. Mr. Snowmen~

us. ayu,nik, penulis blog, ani, alya, sue. hearts all :)

again. camwhoring jela.

peace from hatie ^_^

sue. penaja ala2 picnic gitu :p

jgn tgk kami. tgk tuh sign dilarang masuk. ceh. org dtg nk msok. tak bagi plak. haizz~~

in the end, we had a tremendous happy moment.

sharing is caring~

i was reading through the article Ustaz Zaki gave me last week.
found sumthin to share..
sgt simple nak buat. kalo nak buatlah. tanak sudah. huhu.
wat aper?
ZIKIR ",

Ya-Alim (150 kali) - tingkatkan kecerdasan akal dan kefahaman

Ya-Karim (270 kali) - bebas drpd belenggu hutang

Ya-Awwal (37 kali) - bace before memulakan pekerjaan utk mendapatkan kesempurnaan

Ya-Awwal (1000 kali selama 40 Jumaat) - utk psngn yg tiada anak/kehilangan anak/dilanda musibah

Ya-Ghani ( 1060 kali pada hari Sabtu) - baca agar dicukupkan Allah dgn segala keperluan

Al-Mughni (1121 kali selama 10 Jumaat) - hilangkan penyakit gementar

Al-Muta'ali ( 540 kali) - mndpt kedudukan yg tinggi dan sgt berkesan apb menhdapi temuduga

An-Nur ( 256 kali) - kpd yg tersesat jalan agar ditunjukkan jalan pulang

Selamat berzikir!

cloud 9 huh?

hey..
it's 2 am.
i so much wanna say out loud..
of how i am really HAPPY to be
in cloud nine for an hour ago ",
but still..
i know..
i am a nobody..
so whether it is a cloud nine feels or anything..
still cant change..
of how..
a nobody. a nothing. myself are.
huu~~
at least i smiled for tonite :)
pretty glad i got one more color to add up in among my other crayons..
so i hav u to thank for the smile. the game i've been longing to play. and the crayon color ",
TQ so much!

its FRIDAY =)

oh man.
how time flies so fast. i meant REALLY fast.
da nak abes minggu ke-3 upenye.
yet, my FYP mcm........ahaks. we leave it a blank jela ek :p
haha.

so today is Friday.
how i'm glad coz
weekend is so near around the corner! yippie =)
loves weekend. why?
sebab no lecture or lab or what so ever. HAHA

btw, baby Aashir & family are coming over tomolo for a sleepover.
plus, my Kak Tny too. suda lama yek tak tdo skali. haha :p
wah. skenye rmai ader. ske ske!~~

sangat happy bile dikelilingi all of my favorite persons =)
yup. and also. in hoping to get a new color! bertmbh-tmbh la crayonku. HEE ",

again.

again and again.
and again and again.
over the same thing.
again and again.

somebody save me. from this again disease.
superman perhaps?
*sigh~~~~~~~~~~~



ps: ten days passed by. ohh i still rmbrr that nite. the so-called 'i-think-i-deserved-at-least-a-question' nite.

crap~

iwannawritesumthintomakeusmile
butidunnoifitworksanymore
ohmytheatmosphererightnowissomissingu
iknowishouldhaveletgoofyoubynow
butheyitisnotonesimplethingtodo
timetimetimeiswhatineed
formetoforgetboutuandstarttorealize
thatmylifeaheadisnolongerwillbeurfaceinit
itshardyesyeswaydamnhard
butihavtoihavnootherchoice
iwillbestrongtoliveon
withoutulightingmeupnymore..~~

penat-lah!

ringkasan hariku..( bermulalah hatie nk bebel bagai disineh. hadap jelahhh. haha :D)

-class game yg besh. sbb per? lctrr yg sgt cool giler~ mmg tabik r. mak org pon pro gile bab game!

-lunch kat kedai yg agak mahal tapi tup2 tgk grade C. cett. hampeh. tak bersih! huu~

-class ustad zaki okayh jer...tapi bile msok cite pengasas kete hyundai..agak2 malap dah dunia. huhu. ngntuk. smlm tdo kul 3-lah! haha.

- lepak bilik sir wan ya check psl system scenario. mmg terkezut. sir layan sume lagu yg jiwang abes~~ hee :D

-ptg lepak dc. mkn char kuey teow ngn ani. pastu tersrmpak ngn fara. borak la plak psl dak dip dlu2. byk tul gosip yg aku ketinggalan. haha. kantoi kaki gosip :p

-lepak bilik fara until magrib. tgk2 gmbr wed akak dia..n cite2 sal master..USM jom! haha..sal masa dpn. uhuh. dan2 *sigh~~

-nak balik tngu bas sketnye lama. dahla mlm. ohh. takot. haha. tup2 nmpk lagenda. kjap jer. then bus dah smpai. haizz. time2 neh cpat lak bas smpai. hehe.

-smpai2 gi beli air oren. haiz. ku sangka air oren. tup2 mango. takpelah. tibai jelah. dehydrated sgt dah. hoho.

-mula lah prosesku meredah lorong kegelapan. haha. sgt scary okayh. huhu. seb bek berjaya
smpai ke umah dgn slmtnye. huhu. terpk jgk mahu mendial no itu budak. tapi xpelah..x jadik :p

-okay abeh dah proses bebel kat sineh. saye mahu pegi mandi. sbb da sgt bushuk neh. hee ",

ps: kpd aimi. huhu. see...lu nak jeleskan wa psl lunch td lu dpt tgk lagenda. wa dpt jugak laa...haha. tp mlm lar..hehe :D

pirate turns 4 today!

hello everyone ",

been quite sumtimes huh...
i said the previous one was the last one right..
well i guess..
i juz cant be separated with my writings..
felt so empty. huhu~~

so thanks for today..
i kinda hav sumthin to share with everyone..
ever occured why the name of this url is "piratehatie.blogspot.com" ?
well if u do..
here's the answer..
pirate was a nickname i got from encik awan. and hatie was what people called me in high school~

so..
today is 190110..
kinda like a birthday for pirate...a.k.a me lah. huhu
she turned 4 today..
still confused on what i'm trying to convey here? hehe..
read along k..

190106...
four years back then..
i had my first minor eye surgery..
to shorten up this drama..huhu..
i met the first guy that had made me went
head over heels for a year..
so since our first time we met was a rili rare one..
that is why i remembered til now..
why is it rare?
hmm..
met a stranger on a bus sitting next to me with my one eye berbalut dah sebijik
cam pirate. huhu. mmg rare. we talked. we fight. we laughed. dah mcm knal lama plak. haha..turned out to be a great guy..
at least for me lah..
well only one word to describe the whole love at first sight thingy..
c o i n c i d e n c e
everything bout him is coincidently happen..
lagi2 bab terserempak. mmg coincidence abes..bleh plak terjumpe.
more than once okay..
so mmg mcm berjodoh. huhuu~
ape jadik ngn dia skrng..?
hmm..
ade jer..
kat facebook pon ade jer..
kdng2 menyemak kat page aku. haha.
no offense dear. ati mmg suke kutuk m :p
he's married. and a great father to a luvly baby girl ",
i'm happy for him =)
nak upload gambar. takde la plak. sbb time tuh i still pkai my 3310. haha. so xde camera nk snap. huhu.
well to him, dun wori dear..
i had put our story way and way and way behind already..
still teringat. tapi it's the past ",

okay..tuhje lah..
x besh ek post neh..haha. tuhla dah lama x tulih. x reti dah. huhu.

emm..
kalo previous years..1901 came jer..mmg akan teringat la..n dgr jgk la lagu2 yg berkaitan. huhuu..tapi diz year..honestly..tak ingt sgt kot..sbb ape. sbb fyp yg mengong tuh. haha.
ari neh cam mental sket pk psl fyp. plus..there's sumone else on my mind..24/7 =)
so..tak sempat pk psl encik awanku. hee. k lah. jage anak bini baek2 ",

i will be back!

gud news ppl!

i will be back...

i hav enuf strength now...

despite of everything...

i'll live. i'll be strong.

and i am so ready to write again!

will be back in another 2 days..

why??

wait and see.

later =)

last post.

hello to all my readers,

sadly, this is gonna be my last post
for shadows of mine..
whether this is temporary or forever
terminate, hmm i'm not sure..
but currently i rili need to be by myself..
and i decided to give up on my writing here..
i'm juz afraid i'll be writing
a lot more on my personals..
which i noe not everything we can share
with the rest of the world..
i guess it's hard living alone..
where you dun hav any place to share
ur stories with..
i hope diz new year will gimme
a new strength to fulfill what i need most..
inshaAllah, Allah will always be there for me..
to guide me along the way
to my success..
till we meet again..

gudbye everyone~






for you. and only u my dear..
my heart wont move an inch
unless that footmark of urs fades..
and u should know better..
of how long it will stay there..
and never fades..
heart u always my love~~

the day

the day has finally comes...
it was a really
long moment of my awaits..
trust me..
a month could feel like a year..

although today is the 3rd of Jan already..
and still..
everything isn't back on the right track..
but, you out of all people..
knows better right..
of how 030110 is only a date.
a deadline. a number.

and i surely haven't put an end
even though the day has comes..
i guess there is actually..
no deadlines or what so ever..
when it comes to
the expiry date of loving sumone..

there are some things in life..
that won't change..
and never change..
sarangheyo~

s e a s o n

it only started for awhile..
there are loads of
unshared stories to share with..
haven't yet get the chance
to know the real someone..
still..
it feels like
a life had already been shared..
i guess..
you just knew..
of the one..
who are meant for u..
even though we didn't get the chance
to even be together for one
complete season..
still..
i know
deep inside..
you're the one..
i wanna share all of
the four great seasons with..~

pic credits to google

long night. bright and early morning =)

morning.

i've been hearing the same song
again. and again. the whole night.
and ended up with the same conclusion T_T
i guess..
i'm not dat strong after all...
honestly, this sucks.
i wanna end everything.
and by end, not US...
i meant. this whole dilemma
we are goin through. ohhh~~

ps: white flag rili worth a bucket of tears T______T

for you~

KAVANA - Will You Wait For Me

I need to talk with you again,
why did you go away,
All our time together, just feels like yesterday,
I never thought I'd seen,
a single day without you,
the things we take for granted,we can sometimes lose.
And if I promise not to feel this pain,
Will I see you again,
will I see you again.
Cos time will pass me by, may be I'll never learn to smile,
But i know I will make it through,
if you wait for me.
(won't you wait for me.)
And all the tears I cry,
no matter how I try.
They will never bring you home to me,
won't you wait for me in heaven.
Do you remember how it was,
when we never seemed to care.
The days went by so quickly,
cos I thought you'd always be there.
It's hard to let you go,
though I know that I must try.
I feel like I've been cheated,
cos we never said goodbye.
And if I promise not to feel this pain,
Will I see you again.
Cos I miss you so,
and I need to know,
Will you wait for me.

twothousandten

started the new year with reciting the Surah Yaasin with the love ones~
Abah act as the host of a little kenduri tahlil held this morning..
it's great.
nvr done diz one on a new year.
what a good start for my family.
i hope everything goes well.
me to be exact.
i hurt too many ppl that i heart in my family.
hoping in 2010, i can change to be a better person
and always asking for forgiveness.

in short,
i am really looking forward in 2010.
a life that i've waited for so long.
only those who are close to me
understand what life i'm referring to here.
it had been more than a decade the hurt i've to endure.
it's time.
for me to really be me. and no longer a part time hypocrite.
2010. yup. i hope
everything goes as planned.
inshaAllah~

now i understand. i've hurt my most beloved person on earth.
forgive me. again. my first goal this year. be a solehah daughter. inshaAllah~

so dat is why i dont deserve to receive anymore love from sumone i
truly heart..what goes around comes around huh? huu~

gudbye 2009, hello 2010!

hey everyone!
firstly, happy new year ",

i hope everyone will
achieve what they desire of..
hav to put a lot of hardwork all right!
good luck =)